Daily Archives: 13 January 2008

Unacceptable words and phrases – Predicting the Future

While everyone argues about monkeys and mothers, we should be thankful that cricket has not been taken over by lawyers (of the american kind!), atleast not until now. Assuming that they are going to take over the future, the following are some words and phrases that may get you in trouble if used on the field:

1. Batsman – Too gender specific when other terms such as bowler, fielder are not. Possible replacement “batsperson”

2. Fast/slow bowler – Speaks to a person physical abilities, not acceptable. Possible replacements are “bowler who bowls at speeds at 120kmph or higher” etc.

3. Little Master or Little Champion – Speaks to a person’s physical disability and distinguishes between people’s roles, are players are equal.

4. Fielding positions like “silly point”, “short leg”, “long leg”  for obvious reasons – Replacements are “position that is at 30-45 degrees from the batsperson and at a distance not greater than 2 meters” etc.

5. Balls – May be used as slang term indicating body parts, not accceptable – Replacement can be “a leather item that is spherical in shape”

6. People with names that can offend others or other professions are not allowed, e.g., “Darling”, “Engineer”, “Taylor” etc – Replacements have “person whose name rhymes with professional who stitches clothing” etc.

And on and on..

I will leave you to imagine providing ball by ball (oops, I mean “a leather item that is spherical in shape” by “a leather item that is spherical in shape”) commentary using such a scenario……..

– Cheers,