We still have 2 days for the next India game to commence against The Netherlands in the Cricket World Cup 2011.
I believe we also have two days to celebrate the downfall of a few useless players that MS Dhoni seems to like a lot — Piyush Chawla, RP Singh and Ravindra Jadeja, to name a few! For, how else can you explain their presence in Team India?
Normal programming should resume for the next game against West Indies, I believe, when R. Ashwin takes up the bowling for India — perhaps even within the first five overs.
But I thought we would lighten up the spirits — partially motivated by this effort — and pull together a compilation of Shastri-isms.
In general, if you want to speak like Shastri, it is best that you do not visit the toilet for about 22 days on the trot. Constipation tablets help too; the sort that creates, not cures, constipation! Having reached that state, all you then need is memorize and randomly use any of the phrases below. The 22-day constipation state will give you your voice. The rest is easy!
- That shot raced to the fence went like a TRACER bullet
- That will do his confidence a world of good
- Dhoni will have to manuFACTture something here now
- Dhoni will have to get a wicket soMEhow
- India just HAS to get a wicket from someWHERe (like a sports shop perhaps?)
- That is just BRILLiant captaincy
- There is a LOT of cricket left in this game you know
- Edged……………………… and TAKENNNNN
- As long as Sachin is there, you can never write off India
- As long as DHOni is there, you can never write off India
- As long as SHEWAg is there, you can never write off India
- As long as BHAJji is there, you can never write off India
- GamBHIR is a little fighter. As long as GamBHIR is there, you can never write off India
- India dePEND on Sachin just TOO much
- Zaheer is a much improved bowler these days
- This is a BIG game for these two sides
- You can never write off this side
- You can just feeeeel the atmosphere in this ground
- The crowd is just elecTRICKKKK
- This crowd has just come alIVE
- This game has been set up so niCELy
- This is JUST what this game needed
- This is a craCKERJACK of a game
- This spell will be CRUCial
- This partnership will be CRUCial
- This old ball will be CRUcial
- This new ball will be CRUcial
- We are in for a humdinger of a game here
- That ball was SWEETly timed
- That ball RACes to the fence (this is when he discards the TRACer bullet reference)
- What a game this has been
- Look at his concentration! Sachin TENDulkar looks set for a LONG innings folks
- And uPP goes that DREADed fingER
- That was JUST what the doctor ordered
- This match is going down to the wire
- So MS what was it like out there (“Well of course”)
- And Dhoni goes for the maXIMum
- BANGGG…… MAXIMUM
- I have a feeling that one of them is going to cuT LOose now
- This is India’s LASt recognized pair out there (when Sreesanth and Munaf Patel are batting)
- I just get that feeling India are going to romp home with a win here (he gets lots of “feelings” you know!)
Please add…
– Mohan (@mohank on Twitter)
